Why do we kiss? Does kissing serve a function? Or is it just a way to intitiate sex? Turns out, there is a lot that goes into a kiss. From an evolutionary perspective, kissing is one way to determine a potential mate's health status, hygiene, and reproducing potential. You are close enough to smell their glands that secrete genetic, immunological, and pheromone (a secreted or excreted chemical factor that triggers a social response in members of the same species) information. In other words the saying, “it's all in the first kiss” is true in that almost immediately we can sense if this person will be a good long-term mate.
So what happens when you have the first kiss and both your biological components match? Your bodies begin to bond and become aroused by releasing:
- Dopamine: The energizer- gives us motivation, drive, and pleasure
- Serotonin: The stabilizer- helps you regulate mood, pain, digestion and sleep cycles
- Endorphins: Well-being- the body's natural opiates that give us a feeling of happiness and satisfaction.
- Oxytocin: The bonder- the feeling of love, safety, and security that also reduces stress and blood pressure.
The 6 Second Kiss:
The six second kiss is described by relationship expert John Gottman is an easy exercise to improve your relationship. Often times couples forget about the simple pleasure of kissing unless it is involved in foreplay. Spending a full six second count with your partner increases the amount of the chemicals released and communicates more passion and intimacy than just a quick peck.
One easy way to get back on track when you and your beloved are feeling disconnected? Kiss more! Making a point to increase your kissing frequency can help maintain or increase feelings of connection.